Wednesday, July 16, 2008

No-Fault Living?

I hope you’re staying on track, getting everything you want in life, and finding happiness beyond what you ever thought possible! If not, what’s holding you back? Have you ever thought about it? If you are making progress and moving towards your goals, then you probably are doing everything that you can do. If you seem to take 2 steps forward and then 3 steps back, maybe it’s time we examine what is really going on.


Being in control of one’s life and actions is the ultimate goal. After all, you should be the person making decisions that affect your life, correct? If you follow that logic, then taking responsibility for everything that happens in your life is of utmost importance. This concept was described by a psychologist named Julian Rotter back in 1954, and is called the “locus of control”. Julian said that people tend to think that either events in their lives are mostly of our own control (internal locus) or for the most part outside of our
control (external locus). The word locus just means “center or source of something”.

So the question begs, are you in control? Is your “locus of control” internal? Do you believe that if you work hard and make the right decisions in life that good things will inevitably happen to you? Or do think that your current situation is based on “bad luck” from your past, or just circumstances that are beyond your control? I’m not saying that we all don’t experience some unfortunate events in life occasionally. I’ve never met anyone that drives a car and never, ever had a flat tire! Of course, things that you can control in life are: your relationships with other people, your job, your health, and most of all your attitude. Are there things you can’t control? Sure, I
believe the weather is still one of those things. But even in the case of weather, luck has nothing to do with it. There is a cause and effect in nearly every event in this universe.

So tell me – have you ever met someone that thinks “whatever happens, happens”. In other words I’m not in control, so I just take life as it hits me! Well I’ve only met a few people like that and I can tell you they weren’t really happy people. If you don’t believe, deep down, that you have control over most events in your life, what does that do to your self-confidence? It destroys it. Don’t wait for things to happen to you, be aware of what you want in life and go out to make it happen for you. If something doesn’t go the way you want, take it as a learning experience. Take it as a challenge to do more the next time so that won’t happen again! Don’t play the blame game either, it’s nobody’s fault but your own if you don’t have what you want in life. The sooner you realize that concept, and own up to it, the better.

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