Hello again,
What I’m going to say today may sound a little extreme to some of you – I don’t really care though. Sometimes you just have to say it the way you think it, no holds barred. This lesson is about making goals, or more to the point, about keeping your goals.
I’m sure you’ve made goals in the past – some of which have been met, and maybe some of which have not quite been reached. Why do you think you can’t reach certain goals? Is it because they are just over your limit, more than you “belief system” can handle?
Or is it because you just didn’t put enough weight on them? What do I mean by that you ask? I mean are they goals that you can’t live without. Goals that mean so much to you that if they aren’t met, you feel as if you have failed miserably. At some point in your life you will probably have a few goals like this, ones that you know if you don’t reach it will haunt you forever, you just can’t give them up for anything. I have a special name for my goals like this…
They are the “do or die” goals – or DOD for short. Yes, I said it. If I don’t reach some of the goals I set for myself I will feel really dead inside, so I may as well be dead. Ok, not literally, but they are must have things in life that drive me every day, no matter what else is going on in my life. The top of the line if you will, and I’m sure you have a at least one or two of them too. What would these goals be you ask? I think maybe most people would say finding the perfect mate to marry, that “soul mate” that they need in life to be completely happy deep down. Others may say that a financial goal is most important, or finding that perfect gig, career, job with the perfect company, or perfect home business. What ever it is, you must have it, do or die, no matter what.
I believe it was Curtis Jackson (aka Fifty Cent, the rapper) who made the expression popular, but many have probably also said it as well – that he wanted to “get rich or die trying”. That is a little extreme, I know. However, like Curtis, if you have a goal in your mind that you must reach, then that is how you feel about it. Now I know that thought goes against nearly every person that espouses the law of attraction mindset, which is to be spiritual and giving and to let the energy flow until you feel it inside, then all the happiness will flow from your very being and all your dreams will come true. Right? Well I think that sometimes you just have to do whatever it takes to reach your goals (short of hurting others or taking advantage of anyone else) and set your mind in motion to reach them no matter what, do or die. If that goes against your philosophy, I’m not going to apologize or feel badly. You must make your own judgment as to how far you will go, how hard you will work, what sacrifices you will make to reach your goals. Am I talking mostly about a “psychological paradigm” here? I believe that’s the word for it, yes. It’s the ability to reach a certain level of mindset where you are obsessed, totally devoured by your goals. Some would say that is wrong, but maybe those people just don’t have what it takes to be successful and reach their goals. I still believe you must have a balance in life, but there are certain times that you need that extra push, that do or die mindset, to get where you need to go. If you agree with me, let me know. Otherwise, let’s just agree to disagree, ok?
To your continued success and happiness!
the happiness place
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Monday, January 5, 2009
Do you have the magic ingredient to success?
Good day,
I know a lot of you probably think you have it, but if you're not headed quickly in the direction of your goals, and having at least a modicum of success, you may be missing the main ingredient to success in life. What is it? It's what makes you keep going when you really don't feel like working any more. It's what causes you to keep making changes at your job, or business, or whatever it is you do, until you are totally satisfied it's "right". It's what makes good people great, and keep doing what they do year in and year out.
Ok, if you can't guess what I'm talking about I must divulge the secret - one word, discipline. Yup, that's it. Without it the smartest person can't do much at all. Without it, the most talented people in the world fall flat on their faces! It's the one thing you just can't be successful without, am I right? So do you have enough of it yet? Could it be that is the main reason you aren't reaching the kind of success you have been looking for?
I speak and write a lot about having passion for what you do in life, whether it's your job or business, and I still think that's extremely important to success as well. However, without the discipline to keep focused on what you need to do every day it's very hard to accomplish what you need to do. As they say, good intentions are useless without the follow through, and that is done with discipline. You don't have to be a drill sargeant, but if you can't make yourself do what you have to do on a daily basis, you are just not going to make it this competitive world my friend! It's that simple...
So I guess the question begs - if I don't have enough discipline, how can I improve it? Is it something I can fix? Of course, being lazy isn't a genetic defect, it's just a bad habit like many others. If you have that habit, then you have to break it fast. Will it take some work? You bet, it's gonna take a bunch of work. Like any bad habit you have to first resolve yourself that it can be changed, and they way to break any habit is to be conscious about it and know your weaknesses. You aren't consciously being lazy, are you? It's something that you do without thinking most likely, so start being conscious and in control more each day. Also, write down the things you want to accomplish on a daily basis, this forces you to think about what you know you need to do, and the excuse of "I forgot!" is totally taken away. If you need to, keep that list with you at all times. I must say, I make the lists myself nearly every day because I know if I don't I will forget something, so do it! If it works, keep doing it. If it doesn't work for you, try harder or try something else. Everybody is different, but some things like this work for almost everybody.
You know, that's the thing about discipline. If you don't have any at all, it's going to be a bunch of work to develop it. But the work will be well worth it, because you will notice your productivity will explode and you will find you can accomplish much more on a daliy basis. Besides what's the alternative? Go through life being lazy and unproductive? I don't think so! You must, for your own good, get this magic ingredient to success. So write it down, tattoo it on your arm, whatever you need to do. Just get it!
To your continued success and happiness!
I know a lot of you probably think you have it, but if you're not headed quickly in the direction of your goals, and having at least a modicum of success, you may be missing the main ingredient to success in life. What is it? It's what makes you keep going when you really don't feel like working any more. It's what causes you to keep making changes at your job, or business, or whatever it is you do, until you are totally satisfied it's "right". It's what makes good people great, and keep doing what they do year in and year out.
Ok, if you can't guess what I'm talking about I must divulge the secret - one word, discipline. Yup, that's it. Without it the smartest person can't do much at all. Without it, the most talented people in the world fall flat on their faces! It's the one thing you just can't be successful without, am I right? So do you have enough of it yet? Could it be that is the main reason you aren't reaching the kind of success you have been looking for?
I speak and write a lot about having passion for what you do in life, whether it's your job or business, and I still think that's extremely important to success as well. However, without the discipline to keep focused on what you need to do every day it's very hard to accomplish what you need to do. As they say, good intentions are useless without the follow through, and that is done with discipline. You don't have to be a drill sargeant, but if you can't make yourself do what you have to do on a daily basis, you are just not going to make it this competitive world my friend! It's that simple...
So I guess the question begs - if I don't have enough discipline, how can I improve it? Is it something I can fix? Of course, being lazy isn't a genetic defect, it's just a bad habit like many others. If you have that habit, then you have to break it fast. Will it take some work? You bet, it's gonna take a bunch of work. Like any bad habit you have to first resolve yourself that it can be changed, and they way to break any habit is to be conscious about it and know your weaknesses. You aren't consciously being lazy, are you? It's something that you do without thinking most likely, so start being conscious and in control more each day. Also, write down the things you want to accomplish on a daily basis, this forces you to think about what you know you need to do, and the excuse of "I forgot!" is totally taken away. If you need to, keep that list with you at all times. I must say, I make the lists myself nearly every day because I know if I don't I will forget something, so do it! If it works, keep doing it. If it doesn't work for you, try harder or try something else. Everybody is different, but some things like this work for almost everybody.
You know, that's the thing about discipline. If you don't have any at all, it's going to be a bunch of work to develop it. But the work will be well worth it, because you will notice your productivity will explode and you will find you can accomplish much more on a daliy basis. Besides what's the alternative? Go through life being lazy and unproductive? I don't think so! You must, for your own good, get this magic ingredient to success. So write it down, tattoo it on your arm, whatever you need to do. Just get it!
To your continued success and happiness!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Do New Years resolutions work?
Happy New Year & hello,
Every year many people typically make some kind of New Years resolution - whether it's to quit smoking, lose weight, make more money, be on time, or whatever. Usually it's something that they would like to do or quit doing, and that would improve their lives in the long run. So what's wrong with that? Nothing, nothing at all. It's a positive step in the right direction for most people, so that's the good part. The bad part about resolutions is that in most cases they just don't work, period. Have you ever in your life known anybody that actually quit smoking on the first day of a new year, and never started again? How about losing weight - do you know anybody that lost a bunch of weight and kept it off after starting a new diet on the first day of the year? I haven't...
Ok, I'm not one to be negative. I'm always finding positive in everything so what can I find that's positive about resolutions? The best thing about them, as I said before, is they are a positive step in the right direction. If people only think about changing themselves once a year, on the first day of that year, so be it. Some people never even consider that at all! So the good thing is at least it's a start. The keyword is "start", because it's never the end all for anyone. If getting yourself to see your bad habits once a year get's you to make some changes, that's good. Of course it would be much better to think that way all year long, but most people are "too busy" to think about that stuff on a regular basis. Sad, but true. So what about making a New Years resolution to start being a better person all year long? Wow, if only we could stick to that for more than a few days.
I believe most people have other reasons for making resolutions, too. The passing of another year has a psychological impact on everybody, like a marking of time that has passed before our eyes. If you have a really big, landmark birthday coming up, it's even more significant. Are you turning 30 this year? Maybe a decade or two more than that? Ok, you know what I mean then. The passing of certain birthdays really mean a lot to us, a realization that we are not only growing older, but may be missing our chance to do certain things or become what we really want to be as a person. Did you always wish you could travel around the world, but realize that time is running out for you? Or maybe go back to college and finish your degree, or get training for that job you always wanted. The passing of time makes us a little nervous about reaching these landmark changes in our lives, and I believe that has something to do with the whole resolution thing.
So does that mean we shouldn't make resolutions, since most of us won't adhere to them anyway? Of course not! What we should do is make resolutions more often, but call them goals instead, and write them down. Writing things down has a way of making them more real, and in some ways holds our feet to the fire a little bit. If you make a New Years resolution and don't even write it down, the odds that you will even remember it in 2-3 weeks are slim, let alone still be pusuing it! So my advice (which I do myself, of course) is to write down your goals for the year coming up, and seriously think about ways to achieve them. Then post them on your mirror in the bathroom or somewhere you will see them every day. This way you won't be able to forget them. It might even help if you tell a loved one or spouse about some of them, which will give you some support to really take this seriously. Ultimately, only you have the power to make changes in your life, so get busy living!
Visit us at the happiness place for more helpful articles!
Every year many people typically make some kind of New Years resolution - whether it's to quit smoking, lose weight, make more money, be on time, or whatever. Usually it's something that they would like to do or quit doing, and that would improve their lives in the long run. So what's wrong with that? Nothing, nothing at all. It's a positive step in the right direction for most people, so that's the good part. The bad part about resolutions is that in most cases they just don't work, period. Have you ever in your life known anybody that actually quit smoking on the first day of a new year, and never started again? How about losing weight - do you know anybody that lost a bunch of weight and kept it off after starting a new diet on the first day of the year? I haven't...
Ok, I'm not one to be negative. I'm always finding positive in everything so what can I find that's positive about resolutions? The best thing about them, as I said before, is they are a positive step in the right direction. If people only think about changing themselves once a year, on the first day of that year, so be it. Some people never even consider that at all! So the good thing is at least it's a start. The keyword is "start", because it's never the end all for anyone. If getting yourself to see your bad habits once a year get's you to make some changes, that's good. Of course it would be much better to think that way all year long, but most people are "too busy" to think about that stuff on a regular basis. Sad, but true. So what about making a New Years resolution to start being a better person all year long? Wow, if only we could stick to that for more than a few days.
I believe most people have other reasons for making resolutions, too. The passing of another year has a psychological impact on everybody, like a marking of time that has passed before our eyes. If you have a really big, landmark birthday coming up, it's even more significant. Are you turning 30 this year? Maybe a decade or two more than that? Ok, you know what I mean then. The passing of certain birthdays really mean a lot to us, a realization that we are not only growing older, but may be missing our chance to do certain things or become what we really want to be as a person. Did you always wish you could travel around the world, but realize that time is running out for you? Or maybe go back to college and finish your degree, or get training for that job you always wanted. The passing of time makes us a little nervous about reaching these landmark changes in our lives, and I believe that has something to do with the whole resolution thing.
So does that mean we shouldn't make resolutions, since most of us won't adhere to them anyway? Of course not! What we should do is make resolutions more often, but call them goals instead, and write them down. Writing things down has a way of making them more real, and in some ways holds our feet to the fire a little bit. If you make a New Years resolution and don't even write it down, the odds that you will even remember it in 2-3 weeks are slim, let alone still be pusuing it! So my advice (which I do myself, of course) is to write down your goals for the year coming up, and seriously think about ways to achieve them. Then post them on your mirror in the bathroom or somewhere you will see them every day. This way you won't be able to forget them. It might even help if you tell a loved one or spouse about some of them, which will give you some support to really take this seriously. Ultimately, only you have the power to make changes in your life, so get busy living!
Visit us at the happiness place for more helpful articles!
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