Good day,
There is an old expression that many of you probably learned as children that goes “I will believe it when I see it!” This is the common belief that we should only believe the things we see with our eyes, and not be so gullible as to believe things blindly until proven otherwise. Where did this saying come from, and does it still hold true?
I too used to think that in order to be sure you weren’t being “played”, you should always depend on things that are proven. In most cases this means “don’t believe in hearsay, don’t take anybody else’s word for it”. We’re told to get the facts and make sure what your getting is real. But what about the things you want to change in your life, things that if you could make them happen would literally change your world for the better? These are things that you must believe in first before you can see them. I’m not sure if you have ever heard that expression before, I only heard it within the past year or so from a spiritual guru/motivational speaker named Wayne Dyer. It’s one of those messages that when you first hear something inside of you immediately clicks, and a little light goes on. At least that was my experience, I thought “wow, that really makes sense!”. It makes sense to me in a way that at the time I was trying to make some major changes in my life, and having a difficult time of it.
So what is the point of it? If you don’t truly believe in the changes you wish to see in your life, the changes that must come from deep within you, then you will not ever seem them. If you don’t believe you can be a better person, it will never be manifested. This seems so obvious, once you think it through. But we are so programmed to only believe what we first see that at it almost seems like putting the cart before the horse! What if you told a person they could cure their cancer if they believed it strongly enough? In many cases this is exactly the circumstance, however only a person who truly believes that their mind can effect changes in their body will see the results. Is this like a “chicken and egg” theory? What comes first, your belief or your results? Any time you wish to make changes using the power of your mind, the belief system is the main system of power for these changes. And the only way for that to work is to believe, to trust that you can cause things to change and then you will see the results of your efforts. This is a hard concept for some to follow, unfortunately.
So what events or ideas have caused me to change my mind about the whole “see it when you believe it” theory? Many, many people that have told their personal stories about success. People that started from nothing, or were even more disadvantaged than most people, and still found a way to fulfill theirs dreams. People like Ed Roberts, who even with polio as a child (which caused him to be a quadriplegic) overcame severe disabilities to become head of the California Department of Vocation and Rehabilitation — the first person with disabilities to hold that post. Or the story of Nick Vujicic who was born without arms or legs, and leads a normal life and even gives motivational speeches! Check his story out if you get a chance, he’s a true inspiration. I could literally recite the stories of dozens more people that created a wonderful existence for themselves only from their belief that they could. But I’m sure you know where I’m going with this already, right? Take a moment to envision the life you want, belief with all your being that it will happen, and then take that belief to the next level and see it happen.
Visit us at the happiness place for more inspiration
Monday, March 23, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Boost your self esteem and find happiness
Good day,
Something has been bothering me lately, something I saw on a news story just the other day. There was this story about how popular a certain type of plastic surgery was, and it sounded as if quite a few people are getting this procedure done nowadays. Yes, very popular. We must really value our looks, I guess.
I don’t know about you, but I’m not so sure I would like to have someone cutting into my face, even if the end result would be an improvement! And the thing is? It’s not just women getting plastic surgery these days, men are as well. I’m not trying to be judgmental, mind you. I just think it’s way too common for so many people to be unhappy with their looks, and go to the extreme measure of getting surgery to fix it. Ok, that’s a little judgmental. But is there something that may be more important than having great looks? What about our internal being, our personality, how we appear to others through our actions. Isn’t that more important than our outward appearance? Maybe you agree, maybe not.
With all the money being spent on plastic surgery, and I’m sure it’s in the billions in this country, wouldn’t it be easier to try and fix our self-esteem and confidence than our faces? I certainly think so. Look, I’m not against getting surgery to fix something that’s actually broken, but just to get the “perfect” nose, or better cheek bones, or something I totally don’t understand, botox? What is that all about? Putting a poison into your skin so you don’t have that worried look all the time, wow. That would make me worry more, putting that stuff in my face! I would worry about what my self-esteem has come to, to need that kind of a fix…
So how do we deal with this problem, lack of self-esteem. Because we all know that the vast majority of people getting plastic surgery must have at least some lack thereof, what’s the answer? Self Esteem is how you feel about yourself. Image is about how you see yourself and how you believe others see you. They are closely connected because if you have a poor opinion of yourself your self esteem will be low. There are many ways to boost self-esteem, and here are a few:
1. Take an inventory of your good qualities. You may be surprised how many great things about you that go unnoticed. If you need help, just ask a friend, or better yet your mother! They know all the good things about you. Don’t hesitate to feel good about yourself!
2. Do something nice for someone. Believe it or not, doing a good deed for someone else makes you feel much better about yourself! (it’s a proven fact, jack)
3. Stay away from negative or pushy people. If you have friends or even people at work that are always negative, or seem to say things to you that make you feel badly, stay away from them! You don’t have to put up with these kinds of people, they aren’t good for you. Stay positive in your attitude, you will feel better about yourself.
4. Take time to work on things that need improvement. We all have things that we need to work on, whether it’s shyness, or difficulty in speaking up for ourselves, just know that working on these problems can make great improvements happen. Read a book specifically about your situation, then make a conscious effort to improve. You will see results!
5. Above all, believe in yourself. You are the one person that has control over what happens to you, so take control and be the person you know you can be.
Remember that building self-esteem and confidence in yourself don’t happen overnight, but it can happen if you really make the effort. After all, most people really don’t notice that your face isn’t perfect anyway. Who among us has a perfect face? Let’s work on the inside first, I promise that the last thing you will need is surgery to fix anything if you take care of your self esteem!
To your continued success and happiness!
Check out my new retirement blog: motivation in retirement
Something has been bothering me lately, something I saw on a news story just the other day. There was this story about how popular a certain type of plastic surgery was, and it sounded as if quite a few people are getting this procedure done nowadays. Yes, very popular. We must really value our looks, I guess.
I don’t know about you, but I’m not so sure I would like to have someone cutting into my face, even if the end result would be an improvement! And the thing is? It’s not just women getting plastic surgery these days, men are as well. I’m not trying to be judgmental, mind you. I just think it’s way too common for so many people to be unhappy with their looks, and go to the extreme measure of getting surgery to fix it. Ok, that’s a little judgmental. But is there something that may be more important than having great looks? What about our internal being, our personality, how we appear to others through our actions. Isn’t that more important than our outward appearance? Maybe you agree, maybe not.
With all the money being spent on plastic surgery, and I’m sure it’s in the billions in this country, wouldn’t it be easier to try and fix our self-esteem and confidence than our faces? I certainly think so. Look, I’m not against getting surgery to fix something that’s actually broken, but just to get the “perfect” nose, or better cheek bones, or something I totally don’t understand, botox? What is that all about? Putting a poison into your skin so you don’t have that worried look all the time, wow. That would make me worry more, putting that stuff in my face! I would worry about what my self-esteem has come to, to need that kind of a fix…
So how do we deal with this problem, lack of self-esteem. Because we all know that the vast majority of people getting plastic surgery must have at least some lack thereof, what’s the answer? Self Esteem is how you feel about yourself. Image is about how you see yourself and how you believe others see you. They are closely connected because if you have a poor opinion of yourself your self esteem will be low. There are many ways to boost self-esteem, and here are a few:
1. Take an inventory of your good qualities. You may be surprised how many great things about you that go unnoticed. If you need help, just ask a friend, or better yet your mother! They know all the good things about you. Don’t hesitate to feel good about yourself!
2. Do something nice for someone. Believe it or not, doing a good deed for someone else makes you feel much better about yourself! (it’s a proven fact, jack)
3. Stay away from negative or pushy people. If you have friends or even people at work that are always negative, or seem to say things to you that make you feel badly, stay away from them! You don’t have to put up with these kinds of people, they aren’t good for you. Stay positive in your attitude, you will feel better about yourself.
4. Take time to work on things that need improvement. We all have things that we need to work on, whether it’s shyness, or difficulty in speaking up for ourselves, just know that working on these problems can make great improvements happen. Read a book specifically about your situation, then make a conscious effort to improve. You will see results!
5. Above all, believe in yourself. You are the one person that has control over what happens to you, so take control and be the person you know you can be.
Remember that building self-esteem and confidence in yourself don’t happen overnight, but it can happen if you really make the effort. After all, most people really don’t notice that your face isn’t perfect anyway. Who among us has a perfect face? Let’s work on the inside first, I promise that the last thing you will need is surgery to fix anything if you take care of your self esteem!
To your continued success and happiness!
Check out my new retirement blog: motivation in retirement
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Are your moods really contagious?
Hello again,
We all know that the common cold is contagious – most of us catch at least one or more of these nasty annoyances every year. Did you know that your moods can be contagious as well? It may not seem possible, but in a subtle way we all can “catch” another persons bad mood, or good mood, depending on certain factors.
How does this happen? I’m sure you’ve been in a situation before where you’re at work, and someone comes over with something very important that they want to share with you. They seem very excited about it, and pass the good news on to you. If they are conveying to you a happy story about something or someone you also are interested in, or just a funny anecdote that you both find amusing, your mood will undoubtedly be affected at least for a few minutes. You can’t help be put in a good mood! This is an obvious way, but in a more subtle way, what if you just talk briefly with someone on the street, someone you don’t even know. You catch their expression, which seems very distressed and unhappy. Did you know you are very likely to mimic the persons expression, if only for a few milliseconds? Research shows that some people are more prone to pass on their moods due to their more frequent use of facial expressions. Others apparently are more susceptible as a recipient of this contagious effect.
According to Dr. Elaine Hatfield, a psychologist at the University of Hawaii, "Emotional contagion happens within milliseconds, so quick you can't control it, and so subtly that you're not really aware it's going on”. This is more true of very subtle emotions such as cheerfulness, melancholy or irritability, because the vast majority of emotional life, researchers have found, is in this range. Your not likely to “go ballistic” because you see someone else having a temper tantrum, luckily. But in every day life we not only pass on our moods to others, but catch certain moods from other people depending on a) the relative strength of one persons mood, compared to another person and b) the level of synchronicity that is being experienced by the two people. If one person is in a relatively depressed or sad mood, he or she will seek out another who is also in the same mood. For some reason we all seek to “validate” our moods and so it appears we feel drawn to people that share our mood at the moment. "People seek to confirm whatever view they hold of themselves, even if, for the moment, it is a negative one," said Dr. Gordon Bower, a psychologist at Stanford University who is a leader in the research on moods. "In general, you seek out people who are in the same mood you are in."
It is perhaps no surprise that people's moods affect how they see their future. On a daily basis, we aren’t aware of these subtle swings in mood. Psychologists point out that people are largely unaware that a good or bad mood is creating an optimistic or pessimistic outlook: it simply seems that the facts support one or another view. Aren’t we conscious of this? Appalling.
So how can we use this to our advantage? Ah, yes. You knew I was going to try and find a useful connection in all of this at some point, didn’t you? The lesson to be learned, if not obvious, is to stay away from depressed people! Ok, that’s probably not fair. You don’t want to seem insensitive to others feelings, so let’s just say that if you are confronted with another person that is in a decidedly bad or depressed mood, remind yourself that you are in a good mood and try not to “catch” the other persons mood. In fact it would be good if you could try your best to transfer some of your happiness to the other person, although that can many times be a difficult task!
Either way, do your best to be conscious of your moods on a daily basis. In this way you have more control over not only your mood, but also whether you are affected by the moods of others. I don’t know if some people are “carriers” or not, but if so I would want to be a carrier of good moods rather than bad. Just another of my points of happiness to strive for, I guess. And by the way, if you’re in a bad mood, keep your distance ok? Just kidding…
To your continued success and happiness!
Check out my new retirement blog here: financial planning in retirement
We all know that the common cold is contagious – most of us catch at least one or more of these nasty annoyances every year. Did you know that your moods can be contagious as well? It may not seem possible, but in a subtle way we all can “catch” another persons bad mood, or good mood, depending on certain factors.
How does this happen? I’m sure you’ve been in a situation before where you’re at work, and someone comes over with something very important that they want to share with you. They seem very excited about it, and pass the good news on to you. If they are conveying to you a happy story about something or someone you also are interested in, or just a funny anecdote that you both find amusing, your mood will undoubtedly be affected at least for a few minutes. You can’t help be put in a good mood! This is an obvious way, but in a more subtle way, what if you just talk briefly with someone on the street, someone you don’t even know. You catch their expression, which seems very distressed and unhappy. Did you know you are very likely to mimic the persons expression, if only for a few milliseconds? Research shows that some people are more prone to pass on their moods due to their more frequent use of facial expressions. Others apparently are more susceptible as a recipient of this contagious effect.
According to Dr. Elaine Hatfield, a psychologist at the University of Hawaii, "Emotional contagion happens within milliseconds, so quick you can't control it, and so subtly that you're not really aware it's going on”. This is more true of very subtle emotions such as cheerfulness, melancholy or irritability, because the vast majority of emotional life, researchers have found, is in this range. Your not likely to “go ballistic” because you see someone else having a temper tantrum, luckily. But in every day life we not only pass on our moods to others, but catch certain moods from other people depending on a) the relative strength of one persons mood, compared to another person and b) the level of synchronicity that is being experienced by the two people. If one person is in a relatively depressed or sad mood, he or she will seek out another who is also in the same mood. For some reason we all seek to “validate” our moods and so it appears we feel drawn to people that share our mood at the moment. "People seek to confirm whatever view they hold of themselves, even if, for the moment, it is a negative one," said Dr. Gordon Bower, a psychologist at Stanford University who is a leader in the research on moods. "In general, you seek out people who are in the same mood you are in."
It is perhaps no surprise that people's moods affect how they see their future. On a daily basis, we aren’t aware of these subtle swings in mood. Psychologists point out that people are largely unaware that a good or bad mood is creating an optimistic or pessimistic outlook: it simply seems that the facts support one or another view. Aren’t we conscious of this? Appalling.
So how can we use this to our advantage? Ah, yes. You knew I was going to try and find a useful connection in all of this at some point, didn’t you? The lesson to be learned, if not obvious, is to stay away from depressed people! Ok, that’s probably not fair. You don’t want to seem insensitive to others feelings, so let’s just say that if you are confronted with another person that is in a decidedly bad or depressed mood, remind yourself that you are in a good mood and try not to “catch” the other persons mood. In fact it would be good if you could try your best to transfer some of your happiness to the other person, although that can many times be a difficult task!
Either way, do your best to be conscious of your moods on a daily basis. In this way you have more control over not only your mood, but also whether you are affected by the moods of others. I don’t know if some people are “carriers” or not, but if so I would want to be a carrier of good moods rather than bad. Just another of my points of happiness to strive for, I guess. And by the way, if you’re in a bad mood, keep your distance ok? Just kidding…
To your continued success and happiness!
Check out my new retirement blog here: financial planning in retirement
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
How much attention do we really need?
I’m writing today about something that happened very recently in the news, and I just couldn’t ignore it. It’s one of those things that you just have to pay attention to, because you think there can’t be any way it’s true! Apparently a woman in Florida went to a McDonalds restaurant where she planned on buying some “mc-nuggets” for her dinner. She ordered the nuggets, paid for them, and waited for her order. After a few minutes she was told they had run out of this fine culinary treat for which she had already paid for, but they would be glad to give her something else instead. Well, being a huge fan of the nuggets, this woman would have none of it. After being told the store had a “no refund” policy, she went outside and dialed 911 and promptly reported to the police that she couldn’t get her nuggets, and they wouldn’t give her the money back. Ok, you probably think I made this up, but no. It really happened. And the worst part is, she called three times because the police didn’t respond fast enough!
I’m not going to try and defend the McDonalds in any way, because they showed a true lack of customer service skills in this case in my opinion. However, what is it that would make a person call the police because they couldn’t have exactly the meal they ordered at a fast-food restaurant? Is this in any way a police related emergency? Of course not, any rational or even remotely sane person knows that’s not what the 911 emergency system is for. Of course, the woman was arrested and cited for abusing the emergency system, to her surprise no doubt. But what is really going on here? Can anybody take a guess? Of course, another case of someone seeking their 15 minutes of fame. Oh, yeah. She is now on every newscast from New York to California, the three audio tapes from her separate phone calls to 911 (which are recorded automatically, and are public record!) are now on more than a dozen websites including YouTube.com. Yes, she will be famous in no time! How impressive.
Why is this a common thing in our country? I’m not sure if it’s really something that happens in Europe, or Japan, or Iceland, or any other country or continent of the world. Possibly just in good ol’ US, right here, where attention can get you on TV, get you interviewed by famous personalities, and if you’re lucky get you a tour of the country on the talk show circuit. Why, some even get book deals worth millions! Just get your face plastered all over the news for doing something outrageous, whether it’s good or bad really doesn’t matter, and people start a “buzz” over it very quickly. Once you are on YouTube, forget it. You are seen by thousands in matter of hours, possibly hundreds of thousands even. Are we that starved for attention in this country? Is there some kind of payoff for doing this crap? I guess if you are the kind of person that is just starved for attention, maybe because you weren’t hugged as a child or whatever, it fills some void in your life. But really, is it worth it? This woman will quickly become the laughing stock of her town and be unable to go anywhere with being laughed at and pointed at
for months. I really hope she’s happy.
Visit my website for more happiness for life
I’m not going to try and defend the McDonalds in any way, because they showed a true lack of customer service skills in this case in my opinion. However, what is it that would make a person call the police because they couldn’t have exactly the meal they ordered at a fast-food restaurant? Is this in any way a police related emergency? Of course not, any rational or even remotely sane person knows that’s not what the 911 emergency system is for. Of course, the woman was arrested and cited for abusing the emergency system, to her surprise no doubt. But what is really going on here? Can anybody take a guess? Of course, another case of someone seeking their 15 minutes of fame. Oh, yeah. She is now on every newscast from New York to California, the three audio tapes from her separate phone calls to 911 (which are recorded automatically, and are public record!) are now on more than a dozen websites including YouTube.com. Yes, she will be famous in no time! How impressive.
Why is this a common thing in our country? I’m not sure if it’s really something that happens in Europe, or Japan, or Iceland, or any other country or continent of the world. Possibly just in good ol’ US, right here, where attention can get you on TV, get you interviewed by famous personalities, and if you’re lucky get you a tour of the country on the talk show circuit. Why, some even get book deals worth millions! Just get your face plastered all over the news for doing something outrageous, whether it’s good or bad really doesn’t matter, and people start a “buzz” over it very quickly. Once you are on YouTube, forget it. You are seen by thousands in matter of hours, possibly hundreds of thousands even. Are we that starved for attention in this country? Is there some kind of payoff for doing this crap? I guess if you are the kind of person that is just starved for attention, maybe because you weren’t hugged as a child or whatever, it fills some void in your life. But really, is it worth it? This woman will quickly become the laughing stock of her town and be unable to go anywhere with being laughed at and pointed at
for months. I really hope she’s happy.
Visit my website for more happiness for life
Friday, February 27, 2009
You must take risks, to get more rewards!
Good day,
As you may know by now I write an awful lot about motivation and success, and striving for goals. However, there are many different things that stop us from reaching our goals - some people plead ignorance (I don't know where to start!), some just plain procrastinate, and others are paralyzed by fear of the unknown. The unknown being "what would happen if I take a chance and try to go back to college and fail" or something of that nature. This brings me to the subject of risk-taking. Life can be risky, or life can be dull. You just can't have it both ways though. It's either one way or the other for the most part. The thing is that without risk we never challenge ourselves, we never try new things, we never get ahead.
I know a bit about fear, believe me. I was afraid for many years to try certain things; the risk of failure was just too great. But if you think about it we don't grow as human beings without risking something in life. We don't get new jobs without some risk, we don't get a new lover without some risk, and we just don't get much of anything good in life without some risk! So what is it that holds us back, besides fear? Besides the fear of losing, the fear of being wrong, the fear of offending someone else, the fear of other people knowing something about us that makes us vulnerable, is there possibly a larger fear? How about fear of knowing that if we don't do the things in life that really matter to us, we will die knowing we could have done more? That is one of my fears, too. If you project yourself 40, 50, 60 years into the future (depending on your current age) and see yourself in the future, what do you want others to think of you? What accomplishments do you want to be able to brag about to your grand kids? What can you think of that if not master or accomplished, will leave you feeling shorted in life?
I guess the point I'm trying to make is that we have to strike a balance between the things we're most afraid of doing, and the things we will eventually regret if we don't do them. After all, by the time we're adults we realize that taking risks rarely results in death or dismemberment. This does not apply to the crew of Jackass, of course. For most people, taking risks involves the possibility of being embarrassed, or losing money, or breaking up a relationship, something that stings but rarely is fatal. I like to say, "What's the worst thing that could happen?" If you balance that with the best thing that could happen, the best possible outcome of your risk-taking, it's almost always worth it. Or is it? You decide for yourself, but let's look at some comparisons that I totally made up just now:
Risk #1 - Certain baseball players are notorious for their ability to get hits consistently, most notably Reggie Jackson. How often do we associate great sluggers with being risk-takers though? They are, if they want to be known as homerun kings, because it's a fact that most homerun kings also have the most strikeouts. Why? The only way to hit a homer is to fully commit to swinging as hard as you can at the pitch. Most players are too tentative, and are lucky to get a single or double. Jackson struck out 2,597 times while getting 563 home runs. Not a bad average, eh?
Risk #2 - The founding fathers of our country! Yes, our founding fathers were risking everything to break away from Great Britain. They all knew that when they gathered to write the Declaration of Independence back in 1776, if they were caught they would all most likely hang. But the risk was obviously worth it, since founding this new country was they only way to break free from the tyranny of England and arise a free nation. Great risk, great reward! I'm so glad they did, too.
Risk #3 - How about Donald Trump? Love him or hate him, he lost nearly everything back in the late 1980's but came back to score bigger than ever. How did he do it? He risked it all by telling the banks they better renegotiate his loans with them, or they would lose it all. (And that worked?) He knows that only risk-takers make it big, although sometimes they lose big too. What is the difference? Guys like Trump don't mind risking it again, starting over if necessary, trying something new, despite the odds.
Ok, those are just a few of the risky people I can mention here. I'm sure if you think about it you can name more, but what about you? Are you willing to take a risk, to start that business, or go back to college, or train for a marathon, or finally meet that women at the library you can't help thinking about (yes, I saw you checking her out)? We have to if we want to stretch ourselves, to move beyond our ordinary lives. Another way to look at it is why not go for the reward, rather than think about the risk? If you can focus on what you stand to gain the chances you will finally just "go for it" are much greater. So go ahead, get out there and take some chances, the odds are with you! Besides, I know you can do it...
Visit us at our new blog: motivation in retirement
As you may know by now I write an awful lot about motivation and success, and striving for goals. However, there are many different things that stop us from reaching our goals - some people plead ignorance (I don't know where to start!), some just plain procrastinate, and others are paralyzed by fear of the unknown. The unknown being "what would happen if I take a chance and try to go back to college and fail" or something of that nature. This brings me to the subject of risk-taking. Life can be risky, or life can be dull. You just can't have it both ways though. It's either one way or the other for the most part. The thing is that without risk we never challenge ourselves, we never try new things, we never get ahead.
I know a bit about fear, believe me. I was afraid for many years to try certain things; the risk of failure was just too great. But if you think about it we don't grow as human beings without risking something in life. We don't get new jobs without some risk, we don't get a new lover without some risk, and we just don't get much of anything good in life without some risk! So what is it that holds us back, besides fear? Besides the fear of losing, the fear of being wrong, the fear of offending someone else, the fear of other people knowing something about us that makes us vulnerable, is there possibly a larger fear? How about fear of knowing that if we don't do the things in life that really matter to us, we will die knowing we could have done more? That is one of my fears, too. If you project yourself 40, 50, 60 years into the future (depending on your current age) and see yourself in the future, what do you want others to think of you? What accomplishments do you want to be able to brag about to your grand kids? What can you think of that if not master or accomplished, will leave you feeling shorted in life?
I guess the point I'm trying to make is that we have to strike a balance between the things we're most afraid of doing, and the things we will eventually regret if we don't do them. After all, by the time we're adults we realize that taking risks rarely results in death or dismemberment. This does not apply to the crew of Jackass, of course. For most people, taking risks involves the possibility of being embarrassed, or losing money, or breaking up a relationship, something that stings but rarely is fatal. I like to say, "What's the worst thing that could happen?" If you balance that with the best thing that could happen, the best possible outcome of your risk-taking, it's almost always worth it. Or is it? You decide for yourself, but let's look at some comparisons that I totally made up just now:
Risk #1 - Certain baseball players are notorious for their ability to get hits consistently, most notably Reggie Jackson. How often do we associate great sluggers with being risk-takers though? They are, if they want to be known as homerun kings, because it's a fact that most homerun kings also have the most strikeouts. Why? The only way to hit a homer is to fully commit to swinging as hard as you can at the pitch. Most players are too tentative, and are lucky to get a single or double. Jackson struck out 2,597 times while getting 563 home runs. Not a bad average, eh?
Risk #2 - The founding fathers of our country! Yes, our founding fathers were risking everything to break away from Great Britain. They all knew that when they gathered to write the Declaration of Independence back in 1776, if they were caught they would all most likely hang. But the risk was obviously worth it, since founding this new country was they only way to break free from the tyranny of England and arise a free nation. Great risk, great reward! I'm so glad they did, too.
Risk #3 - How about Donald Trump? Love him or hate him, he lost nearly everything back in the late 1980's but came back to score bigger than ever. How did he do it? He risked it all by telling the banks they better renegotiate his loans with them, or they would lose it all. (And that worked?) He knows that only risk-takers make it big, although sometimes they lose big too. What is the difference? Guys like Trump don't mind risking it again, starting over if necessary, trying something new, despite the odds.
Ok, those are just a few of the risky people I can mention here. I'm sure if you think about it you can name more, but what about you? Are you willing to take a risk, to start that business, or go back to college, or train for a marathon, or finally meet that women at the library you can't help thinking about (yes, I saw you checking her out)? We have to if we want to stretch ourselves, to move beyond our ordinary lives. Another way to look at it is why not go for the reward, rather than think about the risk? If you can focus on what you stand to gain the chances you will finally just "go for it" are much greater. So go ahead, get out there and take some chances, the odds are with you! Besides, I know you can do it...
Visit us at our new blog: motivation in retirement
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
What's your happiness set point?
Hello and good day,
Are you one those people that are almost always happy, no matter what is happening in your life? Well me neither, but I’ve known a few people like that in my life and it never ceases to amaze me at their natural ability to maintain a smile every day. A friend of mine is like that, and I have to shake my head in amazement when something goes wrong and he just makes a joke as if it was nothing. That is definitely a great attitude!
Is that a natural inborn thing? I think in some people it is, and really if you think about it we all have a “happiness set point” when we’re born, just a genetic predisposition like any other. Some folks have brown hair, others blonde. Some are left-handed and others are weird. Yes, I’m left-handed. Why do you ask? Anyway, it has to be like any other trait we are born with. Studies have been done on twins and results have shown that we’re born with a “predisposition to feel and express emotions within a certain range”, which varies within a certain range. However, the larger part of our happiness set point is thought to be within our power since actions we take and thoughts we control are obviously a huge part of that influence on happiness. A psychologist by the name of Martin Seligman (
So if you are not one of the few lucky ones that is born in a great mood all the time, what to do? Luckily there are many ways to boost our happiness, and according to researchers Sonja Lyubomirsky, Kennon Sheldon, and David Schkade there is even a happiness equation to illustrate this important relationship:
S + C + V = H (set point + circumstances + voluntary behavior = happiness). What that means is that you are born with a certain happiness set point but you don’t have to be satisfied with your life the way you are born. You can change your circumstances by making changes to your behavior. The question is, what changes should you make? In other words, what makes you happy? That is a question you will have to answer yourself, because everyone is different. Nevertheless, I really believe that is the hardest part for many people!
I know it’s insane, but many people seem to drift through life with no real “long-term” vision, which means they know what makes them happy for the moment, but not what will really fulfill their needs on a long-term basis. That, in my opinion, is the real definition of happiness. Once you figure out the really important things, you can then start making solid plans for obtaining those goals. Do I really love my job? How about my career path? How about my relationship, do I see myself staying where I’m at for the next five years, ten years, even twenty years? Am I spiritually where I want to be? If not, how can I get there? (I know I’m getting off track with the happiness set point topic, but don’t worry I will tie this all together soon). These are questions of course that people have asked since the days of Aristotle. In fact he actually said “all human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsion, habit, reason, passion, and desire.” Well I guess that narrows it down pretty well, thanks Ari. But how much control do we really have, and how much is inborn and thus difficult to change?
The good news is that most modern psychologists say between 50% and 80% of our happiness is really under our control! (In other words, don’t try to blame your parents if you are a grump). And of course we can’t be happy all the time either, in fact it’s probably not even a realistic goal to set. But if you work on a well-defined list of characteristics that most happy people seem to present, your chances are certainly much improved. I have read that the happiest among us have these traits in common:
- enjoy what they do for a living
- have close relationships with family & friends
- have a certain amount of faith (spiritual element)
- describe themselves as optimists
- have at least a modicum of good health
- and last, but not least, have enough material things that they don’t worry about food or shelter for themselves or their family
I hope this helps some people put in perspective what happiness means to them, and how much we really can do to change how we feel about it. Don’t wait, make your list today and get started for your happiness.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Make it a "do or die" goal this time
Hello again,
What I’m going to say today may sound a little extreme to some of you – I don’t really care though. Sometimes you just have to say it the way you think it, no holds barred. This lesson is about making goals, or more to the point, about keeping your goals.
I’m sure you’ve made goals in the past – some of which have been met, and maybe some of which have not quite been reached. Why do you think you can’t reach certain goals? Is it because they are just over your limit, more than you “belief system” can handle?
Or is it because you just didn’t put enough weight on them? What do I mean by that you ask? I mean are they goals that you can’t live without. Goals that mean so much to you that if they aren’t met, you feel as if you have failed miserably. At some point in your life you will probably have a few goals like this, ones that you know if you don’t reach it will haunt you forever, you just can’t give them up for anything. I have a special name for my goals like this…
They are the “do or die” goals – or DOD for short. Yes, I said it. If I don’t reach some of the goals I set for myself I will feel really dead inside, so I may as well be dead. Ok, not literally, but they are must have things in life that drive me every day, no matter what else is going on in my life. The top of the line if you will, and I’m sure you have a at least one or two of them too. What would these goals be you ask? I think maybe most people would say finding the perfect mate to marry, that “soul mate” that they need in life to be completely happy deep down. Others may say that a financial goal is most important, or finding that perfect gig, career, job with the perfect company, or perfect home business. What ever it is, you must have it, do or die, no matter what.
I believe it was Curtis Jackson (aka Fifty Cent, the rapper) who made the expression popular, but many have probably also said it as well – that he wanted to “get rich or die trying”. That is a little extreme, I know. However, like Curtis, if you have a goal in your mind that you must reach, then that is how you feel about it. Now I know that thought goes against nearly every person that espouses the law of attraction mindset, which is to be spiritual and giving and to let the energy flow until you feel it inside, then all the happiness will flow from your very being and all your dreams will come true. Right? Well I think that sometimes you just have to do whatever it takes to reach your goals (short of hurting others or taking advantage of anyone else) and set your mind in motion to reach them no matter what, do or die. If that goes against your philosophy, I’m not going to apologize or feel badly. You must make your own judgment as to how far you will go, how hard you will work, what sacrifices you will make to reach your goals. Am I talking mostly about a “psychological paradigm” here? I believe that’s the word for it, yes. It’s the ability to reach a certain level of mindset where you are obsessed, totally devoured by your goals. Some would say that is wrong, but maybe those people just don’t have what it takes to be successful and reach their goals. I still believe you must have a balance in life, but there are certain times that you need that extra push, that do or die mindset, to get where you need to go. If you agree with me, let me know. Otherwise, let’s just agree to disagree, ok?
To your continued success and happiness!
Check out my new retirement blog for great tips: financial planning in retirement
What I’m going to say today may sound a little extreme to some of you – I don’t really care though. Sometimes you just have to say it the way you think it, no holds barred. This lesson is about making goals, or more to the point, about keeping your goals.
I’m sure you’ve made goals in the past – some of which have been met, and maybe some of which have not quite been reached. Why do you think you can’t reach certain goals? Is it because they are just over your limit, more than you “belief system” can handle?
Or is it because you just didn’t put enough weight on them? What do I mean by that you ask? I mean are they goals that you can’t live without. Goals that mean so much to you that if they aren’t met, you feel as if you have failed miserably. At some point in your life you will probably have a few goals like this, ones that you know if you don’t reach it will haunt you forever, you just can’t give them up for anything. I have a special name for my goals like this…
They are the “do or die” goals – or DOD for short. Yes, I said it. If I don’t reach some of the goals I set for myself I will feel really dead inside, so I may as well be dead. Ok, not literally, but they are must have things in life that drive me every day, no matter what else is going on in my life. The top of the line if you will, and I’m sure you have a at least one or two of them too. What would these goals be you ask? I think maybe most people would say finding the perfect mate to marry, that “soul mate” that they need in life to be completely happy deep down. Others may say that a financial goal is most important, or finding that perfect gig, career, job with the perfect company, or perfect home business. What ever it is, you must have it, do or die, no matter what.
I believe it was Curtis Jackson (aka Fifty Cent, the rapper) who made the expression popular, but many have probably also said it as well – that he wanted to “get rich or die trying”. That is a little extreme, I know. However, like Curtis, if you have a goal in your mind that you must reach, then that is how you feel about it. Now I know that thought goes against nearly every person that espouses the law of attraction mindset, which is to be spiritual and giving and to let the energy flow until you feel it inside, then all the happiness will flow from your very being and all your dreams will come true. Right? Well I think that sometimes you just have to do whatever it takes to reach your goals (short of hurting others or taking advantage of anyone else) and set your mind in motion to reach them no matter what, do or die. If that goes against your philosophy, I’m not going to apologize or feel badly. You must make your own judgment as to how far you will go, how hard you will work, what sacrifices you will make to reach your goals. Am I talking mostly about a “psychological paradigm” here? I believe that’s the word for it, yes. It’s the ability to reach a certain level of mindset where you are obsessed, totally devoured by your goals. Some would say that is wrong, but maybe those people just don’t have what it takes to be successful and reach their goals. I still believe you must have a balance in life, but there are certain times that you need that extra push, that do or die mindset, to get where you need to go. If you agree with me, let me know. Otherwise, let’s just agree to disagree, ok?
To your continued success and happiness!
Check out my new retirement blog for great tips: financial planning in retirement
Monday, January 5, 2009
Do you have the magic ingredient to success?
Good day,
I know a lot of you probably think you have it, but if you're not headed quickly in the direction of your goals, and having at least a modicum of success, you may be missing the main ingredient to success in life. What is it? It's what makes you keep going when you really don't feel like working any more. It's what causes you to keep making changes at your job, or business, or whatever it is you do, until you are totally satisfied it's "right". It's what makes good people great, and keep doing what they do year in and year out.
Ok, if you can't guess what I'm talking about I must divulge the secret - one word, discipline. Yup, that's it. Without it the smartest person can't do much at all. Without it, the most talented people in the world fall flat on their faces! It's the one thing you just can't be successful without, am I right? So do you have enough of it yet? Could it be that is the main reason you aren't reaching the kind of success you have been looking for?
I speak and write a lot about having passion for what you do in life, whether it's your job or business, and I still think that's extremely important to success as well. However, without the discipline to keep focused on what you need to do every day it's very hard to accomplish what you need to do. As they say, good intentions are useless without the follow through, and that is done with discipline. You don't have to be a drill sargeant, but if you can't make yourself do what you have to do on a daily basis, you are just not going to make it this competitive world my friend! It's that simple...
So I guess the question begs - if I don't have enough discipline, how can I improve it? Is it something I can fix? Of course, being lazy isn't a genetic defect, it's just a bad habit like many others. If you have that habit, then you have to break it fast. Will it take some work? You bet, it's gonna take a bunch of work. Like any bad habit you have to first resolve yourself that it can be changed, and they way to break any habit is to be conscious about it and know your weaknesses. You aren't consciously being lazy, are you? It's something that you do without thinking most likely, so start being conscious and in control more each day. Also, write down the things you want to accomplish on a daily basis, this forces you to think about what you know you need to do, and the excuse of "I forgot!" is totally taken away. If you need to, keep that list with you at all times. I must say, I make the lists myself nearly every day because I know if I don't I will forget something, so do it! If it works, keep doing it. If it doesn't work for you, try harder or try something else. Everybody is different, but some things like this work for almost everybody.
You know, that's the thing about discipline. If you don't have any at all, it's going to be a bunch of work to develop it. But the work will be well worth it, because you will notice your productivity will explode and you will find you can accomplish much more on a daliy basis. Besides what's the alternative? Go through life being lazy and unproductive? I don't think so! You must, for your own good, get this magic ingredient to success. So write it down, tattoo it on your arm, whatever you need to do. Just get it!
To your continued success and happiness!
I know a lot of you probably think you have it, but if you're not headed quickly in the direction of your goals, and having at least a modicum of success, you may be missing the main ingredient to success in life. What is it? It's what makes you keep going when you really don't feel like working any more. It's what causes you to keep making changes at your job, or business, or whatever it is you do, until you are totally satisfied it's "right". It's what makes good people great, and keep doing what they do year in and year out.
Ok, if you can't guess what I'm talking about I must divulge the secret - one word, discipline. Yup, that's it. Without it the smartest person can't do much at all. Without it, the most talented people in the world fall flat on their faces! It's the one thing you just can't be successful without, am I right? So do you have enough of it yet? Could it be that is the main reason you aren't reaching the kind of success you have been looking for?
I speak and write a lot about having passion for what you do in life, whether it's your job or business, and I still think that's extremely important to success as well. However, without the discipline to keep focused on what you need to do every day it's very hard to accomplish what you need to do. As they say, good intentions are useless without the follow through, and that is done with discipline. You don't have to be a drill sargeant, but if you can't make yourself do what you have to do on a daily basis, you are just not going to make it this competitive world my friend! It's that simple...
So I guess the question begs - if I don't have enough discipline, how can I improve it? Is it something I can fix? Of course, being lazy isn't a genetic defect, it's just a bad habit like many others. If you have that habit, then you have to break it fast. Will it take some work? You bet, it's gonna take a bunch of work. Like any bad habit you have to first resolve yourself that it can be changed, and they way to break any habit is to be conscious about it and know your weaknesses. You aren't consciously being lazy, are you? It's something that you do without thinking most likely, so start being conscious and in control more each day. Also, write down the things you want to accomplish on a daily basis, this forces you to think about what you know you need to do, and the excuse of "I forgot!" is totally taken away. If you need to, keep that list with you at all times. I must say, I make the lists myself nearly every day because I know if I don't I will forget something, so do it! If it works, keep doing it. If it doesn't work for you, try harder or try something else. Everybody is different, but some things like this work for almost everybody.
You know, that's the thing about discipline. If you don't have any at all, it's going to be a bunch of work to develop it. But the work will be well worth it, because you will notice your productivity will explode and you will find you can accomplish much more on a daliy basis. Besides what's the alternative? Go through life being lazy and unproductive? I don't think so! You must, for your own good, get this magic ingredient to success. So write it down, tattoo it on your arm, whatever you need to do. Just get it!
To your continued success and happiness!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Do New Years resolutions work?
Happy New Year & hello,
Every year many people typically make some kind of New Years resolution - whether it's to quit smoking, lose weight, make more money, be on time, or whatever. Usually it's something that they would like to do or quit doing, and that would improve their lives in the long run. So what's wrong with that? Nothing, nothing at all. It's a positive step in the right direction for most people, so that's the good part. The bad part about resolutions is that in most cases they just don't work, period. Have you ever in your life known anybody that actually quit smoking on the first day of a new year, and never started again? How about losing weight - do you know anybody that lost a bunch of weight and kept it off after starting a new diet on the first day of the year? I haven't...
Ok, I'm not one to be negative. I'm always finding positive in everything so what can I find that's positive about resolutions? The best thing about them, as I said before, is they are a positive step in the right direction. If people only think about changing themselves once a year, on the first day of that year, so be it. Some people never even consider that at all! So the good thing is at least it's a start. The keyword is "start", because it's never the end all for anyone. If getting yourself to see your bad habits once a year get's you to make some changes, that's good. Of course it would be much better to think that way all year long, but most people are "too busy" to think about that stuff on a regular basis. Sad, but true. So what about making a New Years resolution to start being a better person all year long? Wow, if only we could stick to that for more than a few days.
I believe most people have other reasons for making resolutions, too. The passing of another year has a psychological impact on everybody, like a marking of time that has passed before our eyes. If you have a really big, landmark birthday coming up, it's even more significant. Are you turning 30 this year? Maybe a decade or two more than that? Ok, you know what I mean then. The passing of certain birthdays really mean a lot to us, a realization that we are not only growing older, but may be missing our chance to do certain things or become what we really want to be as a person. Did you always wish you could travel around the world, but realize that time is running out for you? Or maybe go back to college and finish your degree, or get training for that job you always wanted. The passing of time makes us a little nervous about reaching these landmark changes in our lives, and I believe that has something to do with the whole resolution thing.
So does that mean we shouldn't make resolutions, since most of us won't adhere to them anyway? Of course not! What we should do is make resolutions more often, but call them goals instead, and write them down. Writing things down has a way of making them more real, and in some ways holds our feet to the fire a little bit. If you make a New Years resolution and don't even write it down, the odds that you will even remember it in 2-3 weeks are slim, let alone still be pusuing it! So my advice (which I do myself, of course) is to write down your goals for the year coming up, and seriously think about ways to achieve them. Then post them on your mirror in the bathroom or somewhere you will see them every day. This way you won't be able to forget them. It might even help if you tell a loved one or spouse about some of them, which will give you some support to really take this seriously. Ultimately, only you have the power to make changes in your life, so get busy living!
Visit us at the happiness place for more helpful articles!
Every year many people typically make some kind of New Years resolution - whether it's to quit smoking, lose weight, make more money, be on time, or whatever. Usually it's something that they would like to do or quit doing, and that would improve their lives in the long run. So what's wrong with that? Nothing, nothing at all. It's a positive step in the right direction for most people, so that's the good part. The bad part about resolutions is that in most cases they just don't work, period. Have you ever in your life known anybody that actually quit smoking on the first day of a new year, and never started again? How about losing weight - do you know anybody that lost a bunch of weight and kept it off after starting a new diet on the first day of the year? I haven't...
Ok, I'm not one to be negative. I'm always finding positive in everything so what can I find that's positive about resolutions? The best thing about them, as I said before, is they are a positive step in the right direction. If people only think about changing themselves once a year, on the first day of that year, so be it. Some people never even consider that at all! So the good thing is at least it's a start. The keyword is "start", because it's never the end all for anyone. If getting yourself to see your bad habits once a year get's you to make some changes, that's good. Of course it would be much better to think that way all year long, but most people are "too busy" to think about that stuff on a regular basis. Sad, but true. So what about making a New Years resolution to start being a better person all year long? Wow, if only we could stick to that for more than a few days.
I believe most people have other reasons for making resolutions, too. The passing of another year has a psychological impact on everybody, like a marking of time that has passed before our eyes. If you have a really big, landmark birthday coming up, it's even more significant. Are you turning 30 this year? Maybe a decade or two more than that? Ok, you know what I mean then. The passing of certain birthdays really mean a lot to us, a realization that we are not only growing older, but may be missing our chance to do certain things or become what we really want to be as a person. Did you always wish you could travel around the world, but realize that time is running out for you? Or maybe go back to college and finish your degree, or get training for that job you always wanted. The passing of time makes us a little nervous about reaching these landmark changes in our lives, and I believe that has something to do with the whole resolution thing.
So does that mean we shouldn't make resolutions, since most of us won't adhere to them anyway? Of course not! What we should do is make resolutions more often, but call them goals instead, and write them down. Writing things down has a way of making them more real, and in some ways holds our feet to the fire a little bit. If you make a New Years resolution and don't even write it down, the odds that you will even remember it in 2-3 weeks are slim, let alone still be pusuing it! So my advice (which I do myself, of course) is to write down your goals for the year coming up, and seriously think about ways to achieve them. Then post them on your mirror in the bathroom or somewhere you will see them every day. This way you won't be able to forget them. It might even help if you tell a loved one or spouse about some of them, which will give you some support to really take this seriously. Ultimately, only you have the power to make changes in your life, so get busy living!
Visit us at the happiness place for more helpful articles!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
The best skill - making decisions
Hello,
Are you pretty good at making decisions? How do you know if you are or aren't? Well, some people seem to make decisions pretty quickly, and others take forever. Which method is the best? In general I believe being decisive is a good thing, in other words being able to quickly weigh your options and decide what is the best choice. Look at it this way, if you are the type of person who can never seem to make up their mind, doesn't it make your decisions that much harder and painful? So what is the real deal, is it fear of making the wrong decision maybe? I believe in most cases, that's the case.
What if you make the wrong decision and it causes problems? Well that's always possible, but not making a decision in the first place is normally worse than making a bad decision. Let me explain that, because I'm sure that doesn't sound logical. Say I put off making a choice of whether I should take a new job that a friend told me about recently. He says it would be different than what I'm doing now, although some of the same skills are involved and I do qualify in many ways for this job. Ok, I'm thinking I "kind of" like my current job, so what are the benefits of the new job that would tempt me? Well, in order to make an informed decision about anything you must weigh the benefits versus that drawbacks. Make a list, take into account your personal choices and how important different aspects of each item on the list really are. As an example of the job:
1. good thing - the pay is slightly higher
2. bad thing - it's in the city and I'm not crazy about that
3. good thing - the company is doing well, my current employer isn't
4. good thing - it's something different, shake up my life a little
5. bad thing - it's different, and I may not like doing it
Ok, you see where I'm going with this right? These are all totally hypothetical reasons which I just made up, but very possibly things you may have to decide in the future. You also have to thing about the intangibles, such as what if you don't take this job and then get laid off from your current job? Are you by nature a risk-taker or do you look for the security first in any new position? If you value security and safety, perhaps staying at your current job is more prudent because at least it's a known factor. Not knowing what is going to happen is pretty scary for a lot of people and not worth the risk. I guess if you are going to lie awake at night worrying about the job situation, it might be a bad idea.
Alright, that's just a hypothetical situation. But if you have a real problem making important decisions about your future, perhaps you need to evaluate why that is true. Some people just don't like to make decisions. If that's the case, I suggest you try to change that, since making decisions in life is a very critical skill that every adult needs to have. Are you really that afraid of making the wrong decision? What's the worst that could happen, you will have to change your mind and maybe lose a little time, money, etc. in the process. Back to reality, folks. We all have made bad decisions at one time or another! We just have to learn from them, that's all. Try to figure out why it was a bad decision, what brought you to that decision, and how you would change that next time. Did you weight all the options first? Did you go with your "gut" instinct, because usually that is the best way to go, although not always. Perhaps you have a friend that is knowledgeable about the situation you're in and asking him or her would be beneficial.
Anyway, I have a decision to make here. Whether to ramble on for another 300 words, or just cut this blog short and be done with it. Ok, one more point - sometimes it's a great idea to take a chance, take advantage of an opportunity, and just go for it. If your decision is anything about that kind of situation, I say go for it. But that's just me...
To your continued success and happiness!
Visit us often at the happiness place
Are you pretty good at making decisions? How do you know if you are or aren't? Well, some people seem to make decisions pretty quickly, and others take forever. Which method is the best? In general I believe being decisive is a good thing, in other words being able to quickly weigh your options and decide what is the best choice. Look at it this way, if you are the type of person who can never seem to make up their mind, doesn't it make your decisions that much harder and painful? So what is the real deal, is it fear of making the wrong decision maybe? I believe in most cases, that's the case.
What if you make the wrong decision and it causes problems? Well that's always possible, but not making a decision in the first place is normally worse than making a bad decision. Let me explain that, because I'm sure that doesn't sound logical. Say I put off making a choice of whether I should take a new job that a friend told me about recently. He says it would be different than what I'm doing now, although some of the same skills are involved and I do qualify in many ways for this job. Ok, I'm thinking I "kind of" like my current job, so what are the benefits of the new job that would tempt me? Well, in order to make an informed decision about anything you must weigh the benefits versus that drawbacks. Make a list, take into account your personal choices and how important different aspects of each item on the list really are. As an example of the job:
1. good thing - the pay is slightly higher
2. bad thing - it's in the city and I'm not crazy about that
3. good thing - the company is doing well, my current employer isn't
4. good thing - it's something different, shake up my life a little
5. bad thing - it's different, and I may not like doing it
Ok, you see where I'm going with this right? These are all totally hypothetical reasons which I just made up, but very possibly things you may have to decide in the future. You also have to thing about the intangibles, such as what if you don't take this job and then get laid off from your current job? Are you by nature a risk-taker or do you look for the security first in any new position? If you value security and safety, perhaps staying at your current job is more prudent because at least it's a known factor. Not knowing what is going to happen is pretty scary for a lot of people and not worth the risk. I guess if you are going to lie awake at night worrying about the job situation, it might be a bad idea.
Alright, that's just a hypothetical situation. But if you have a real problem making important decisions about your future, perhaps you need to evaluate why that is true. Some people just don't like to make decisions. If that's the case, I suggest you try to change that, since making decisions in life is a very critical skill that every adult needs to have. Are you really that afraid of making the wrong decision? What's the worst that could happen, you will have to change your mind and maybe lose a little time, money, etc. in the process. Back to reality, folks. We all have made bad decisions at one time or another! We just have to learn from them, that's all. Try to figure out why it was a bad decision, what brought you to that decision, and how you would change that next time. Did you weight all the options first? Did you go with your "gut" instinct, because usually that is the best way to go, although not always. Perhaps you have a friend that is knowledgeable about the situation you're in and asking him or her would be beneficial.
Anyway, I have a decision to make here. Whether to ramble on for another 300 words, or just cut this blog short and be done with it. Ok, one more point - sometimes it's a great idea to take a chance, take advantage of an opportunity, and just go for it. If your decision is anything about that kind of situation, I say go for it. But that's just me...
To your continued success and happiness!
Visit us often at the happiness place
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